who needs new year's?

i've just made the following resolutions:

• don't be honest about your emotions, because people will always throw it back in your face at the worst moment
  
• don't give money to family members unless they are literally near death, because otherwise they are going to suck you dry
  

like most people, i'm sure i'll ignore these resolutions and go back to Life As Usual tomorrow, but ... today sucks.