pretty-random

craziness at work makes for a dull blog, and very little creative writing, which makes me a sad monkey. but in the interests of giving YOU fodder, here's a couple highlights from the last week:

• get thee to a punnery
  
• post-rapture help and - my favorite - letters and advice on procuring a post-rapture bible
  
• how to make your AA woman happy
  
• and finally, a new story-related picture:
  
  

is this for the story i'm over 16,000 words into? of course not.

incidentally

why yes, valentine's day is the purrrfect time to take down your christmas tree!

on that note, this has been the most fragrant (in a good way), long-lasting tree i've ever had.

if you adore 80's and/or country music, you should seriously consider moving to portland. that or, if you prefer to HUNT for new music on the radio, portland is also a great option.

it is so friggin gorgeous, and i am so utterly happy to be here, that sometimes i can hardly breathe, and yes i felt that way before i got the job. although the incessant jobsearch did drag me down, that happiness was still there.

that is all!

another year of a-muse-ment

somehow fitting to have a pun in there. anyway, i finally found a meme i could get behind, from rpp. i don't have to think (which is great, since it's late), i only have to collect data in a bizarrely meaningful fashion. so without further adieu, here are the first lines from the first post of each month this year:

January: thanks to rashenbo:
February: lately i have been completely overwhelmed with a desire to return home. and by home, i mean oregon.
March: i'm sure it's all those answers about reading books that did me in...
April: this just in!
May: in my last post i mentioned someday writing a book based on my particular brand of crazy.
June: i got this from wen the other day.
July: although i am, in fact, working on my boston post.
August: it can happen, folks. at least in your head.
September: that was the title of the skype chat we had going all night during last week's live code push at work, and yes i came up with the title, and yes i purposely mispelled kegger.
October: i am tired.
November: i'll post a more comprehensive update in the future, of course, but suffice to say:
December: as evidenced by this shot:

from this i surmise i need to work on my use of colons, and also stop doing memes or quizzes at the beginning of the month. anyway, if anyone is interested in doing this, consider yourself tagged!

and now you'll have to excuse me, i'm off to finish watching the lovely dana scully and fall asleep. night!

cheesed off

i came across the most perfect quiz. please witness:

You Are a Chocolate Cheesecake

Rich and greedy, you're attracted to the dark side of life. Nothing ever quite satisfies your inner beast. And somehow, people find that sexy.

What Kind of Cheesecake Are You?

as a bonafide cheese lover, any quiz that asks 'How do you feel about cheese in general?' is a good quiz in my book. but i was quite torn at this one:

Your sense of humor is:
* Eclectic
* Sarcastic
* Weird
* Wild
* Goofy
* Sexy

i can rule out 'wild' right off the bat. as far as percentages go, i can rule out weird, sexy and eclectic. i can be, and often am, all those things, but not as frequently as what's left: sarcastic and goofy.

due to my love of mocking, i ultimately settled on sarcastic, but damn.

other random stuff from this week:
* clearcase sucks ass
* that non-vexing sleep thing? doing better.
* i have had this and this playing nonstop. and no i do not have to be at the computer to continue the nonstopness.
* i got contacted (via IM) today, out of the blue, by a female fan of nelson.

and why? because we are both on a writing list. against my better judgment i said she could email me a story she was working on, and i'd give her feedback on it when i had time. FIVE MINUTES LATER she IM'd me again to ask if i'd read it. hi, i told you the first time, i'm at work.

as to the story itself, let's just say, i have no interest in stories with lines like 'The straps are for your protection'. redundant commas and adjectives aside, the story was thankfully rather short.

i think the lesson here is that if, when talking to a writer about their work, you ask, 'oh, have you had anything published then?' and they reply, 'oh, i couldn't be published!', then you really should just move on.

ok yep, sarcastic -- correct answer!

a pregnant pause

i really did intend my next post to be about last saturday, but this was too special not to share first.

today i went up to the 3rd floor (party floor) to get me some dr. pepper. while i'm putting dr. p into my lunch bag, a cleaning woman (cw) says to me:

you lose weight?
me: yep
cw: ahh.
cw: you have the baby, yes? (motions with her hands to create a large belly)
me: (staring oddly) no…
cw: oh?
me: no, i didn't have a baby.
cw: oh… (looks sad)
me: (does she think i LOST a baby?) no, it's ok, i wasn't pregnant.
cw: oh...ok.

naturally i have heard of overweight women being inappropriately asked if they were pregnant (when's your baby due?? oops!). however i have never heard of the reverse -- someone who's lost weight, and people assumed they WERE pregnant, and then ask about the baby.

and i gotta tell ya, the whole thing - a little surreal.