the audacity of faith

me and my faith been gettin reacquainted lately, in a roundabout way. it's mostly through reading [1] [2] [3] [4], of course, but also through discussions with family and friends. for example today, as i was reading a magazine that a coworker gave me because of an article on the relationship between hope and fantasy stories, given because of an earlier discussion on science fiction, creativity and staving off boredom, the latter being a perennial topic of interest round these parts.

coworker euphemistically warned me that the mag was put out by a religious school. naturally this put me in an intrigued but defensive state. was i going to inadvertently read something homophobic? proselytizing? boring?

gilly on the boring count, and the actual article in question was rather tepid. but the featured article was on the author of this. indeed, the whole issue was centered around hope, such that i wished they'd gotten an interview with ob@ma, audaciously hopeful sort that he is. but suffice to say, this mingling of hope, faith and the particular intersection of western christianity with my own noggin has really got me thinking... what do i really believe? why? and why should it really matter?

because let me tell you, i am a hodgepodge of faiths. i'm my own spiritual melting pot. i'm sure i can attribute a lot of that to my parents, but not because forced a variety of sunday schools down my throat the first 11ish years of my life. no, it's because they encouraged me to think for myself. which means that, by the time i got to college, started living a little, taking religious classes, and learned that the bible is not really what i've always thought it is...

well, it put me into a crisis of faith that i've never quite recovered from. but over time i realized, it wasn't my faith in god that was shaken -- it was my faith in religion. and as any thinking person can tell you, religion is a construct of man. spirituality, my perception and relation to the divine as i perceive it -- that's really the only thing i can rely on.

and yes i am perfectly aware of how fluid that is, but it's *mine*, thus i can rely on it with absolute conviction. however, my amalgamated set of beliefs - and you'll note i'm not detailing them here - are starting to skew my view of religious statements to such a degree that i'm feeling a little startled.

for example, reading about a woman feeling confused after reading about gideon and moses, looking for god to give her a sign, trying to obey god's commands. my initial thoughts, in order:

1. ah, i remember being devoted and reading like that.
2. how silly! does she really think god wrote those commands?
3. this sounds a little pretentious.
4. wait, it's ok. she gets to god her way, and i get there through mine.

i suppose there's a term for this kind of uberfaith (other than uberfaith), and while it tends to create cognitive dissonance, ultimately i find it too stimulating, i believe, to proceed in any other way. that said, if any of you feel like sharing your own views on this obviously personal topic, i'd love to hear them.

then again, since i've already admitted to being an amalgam, this really shouldn't surprise you.

sumatra es yourmatra

or so today's photojourney would like you to believe...

ps. zee latter locale vill be en zee buk.

ring, ring!

as i am about to embark on a bananaesque journey, of the gastronomical variety, at my desk, i thought i would share the well-timed yet random discovery of salient banana facts.

also, please note the bananaphone's startling omission with a combination of respect and derision.

jesus loves us, now let's go kick some ass

in case you wondered how people get ideas like that.

my heart go asplodes for you

it does! oh and also, i suppose these are also part of my continuing quest for novel-related imagery.

a spot of color

since my novel is *so* not ready for sharing, i thought i would share what i could: pictures. the first half of my book takes place in the distant past, and as such, i'm finding pictures of specific locales exceeeeedingly helpful in writing. once i've found an image i feel both fits the particular geography *and* mood, i make it my wallpaper and start writing all over it.

and now, in what will likely be a continuing series, here's my first three location shots, in order:

and now, some minor word amusement

in the Incredibly Pleased With Myself Department: i used the word mahogany in a sentence today. a Serious sentence, mind you. but still, FlagSelfAmusementEnabled.

in the Thank God You Don't Spellcheck Department: i read a submission today with the phrase "terror fying". as in, "terror fying screams". because as everyone knows, only seriously scary screams are the result of unadulterated terror fying. also, terror fying is the #1 cause of giggling in my cube.

progress report

in lieu of a rambly post, here's a general rundown on the last month.

* ~35 degree days i've been able to go *comfortably* coatless: 5
* times i've had to scrape ice off the car: 3
* hours spent researching/plotting novel: ~30
* hours actually writing: ~8
* words to date: 3571
* number of holidays (familial, cultural): 4
* hours i've spent actually working on the job: 16 (includes 12 hours of meetings)
* so, hours of not working: 127
* books read: 6 (8 by april 1)
* average book rating: 3/5
* new coffeehouses located: 1
* times i have felt grateful (this week!): 5

omg

i just worked for a whole hour STRAIGHT!

also, my dad is doing better. :)

that's it. hope you are having a Good Friday.

short attention span thea-tair

sure, that was a show i used to enjoy, and (i'd forgotten this) introduced me to another gem, but really, it's just a name for *me*. i am SAST incarnate, at least at work. give me a chance to focus on anything - reading, writing, actual work (what little there is), and i guarantee you that in a 15 minute period, i will have bounced between at least 4-10 app windows because WHAT'S GOING ON OVER THERE? THERE?

i think i'm bored. i also know that, as much as i enjoy getting to futz around at work, it will never feel right.

this has been going on for weeks, but not helping is anxiety about my dad. if these antibiotics don't start working soon...blegh. on his behalf, i can't think about it, other than to say bleggggh, and please hammer don't hurt him.

and what are you doing?

enough with the writing already

here's a more general update, in case you were bored. although i will say, since there's still no work to be done here, i started actual *writing* yesterday and i'm already wondering if i should start on a different section. =p

saturday was the 11th anniversary of when min and i got hitched up in missoula (approximately 2/3 of the way across the photo). there was a lot more snow that day, which made it all the more surreal when we immediately vacationed in heat-wave stricken southern california. was about 90 degrees all week, i think. a nice little blur, though.

anyway, as often seems to be the case as we get older, we didn't do much smooshy stuff on the actual day, but min felt better sunday. we had some Time To Ourselves in the morning, then took off for (brief) jaunts in two parks, one of which had a rabbit, which is one of our little mascots. we took a scenic route to the surprisingly steep second park, and upon changing elevation a mere 50 feet or so, realized, wouldn't it be great to ditch and just go get lunch?

so we went to marcos, which i have glorified here before, and had a very tasty lunch, followed by a drive down to salem. we visited with my parents for a few hours, discussing all nature of reality shows, religion, health, and science fiction. all in all, a pretty typical parental conversation. then some dinner, where they treated us (happy anniversary/st patrick's!) to way too much food at mcgrath's.

incidentally, those of you who believe in prayer/good vibery, feel free to send some to my dad. a week and a half ago, he was hospitalized for cellulitis [mild ick]. they gave him some SuperAntibiotics -- this is after two weeks at home on pedestrian antibiotics -- and sent him home a few days later. apparently, the infection was not really gone. his left leg is all angry again, fever, the whole nine yards, so my mom's taking him back to the ER today. their doctor tried a few additional things last week but said if that didn't work, he might lose his leg. i'm guessing this is because my dad has diabetes and this, among other things, but suffice to say, this is a bit of an uphill battle, so again, feel free to radiate the good energy towards the tiny hamlet of salem, oregon, particular nexus of my dad.

with that, i'm going out for lunch because i screwed up the one i brought with me. and in case you're wondering, no i don't have a french press yet, thanks!

[citation not really needed]

if you're researching a novel that will have at least a cursory basis in fact, seeing lots of ^{[citation needed]} references within relevant wikipedia articles is really really cool. why?

because no one can call you a liar. there's no proof, man! no citation available! bwahaha!

i mean, what a shame that no one has documented these things! sad.

excuse me while i start creating some "facts".

fyi

outlining a book is a weird kind of tedium. it's exhilarating, actually, because your mind is going a million miles a minute thinking through the possibilities. but then when you stumble into a messy point of logic, or realize that you've already seen that plot point on tv/film a few times, it can be a little frustrating, coming up with That New or Mostly New Idea.

i wouldn't trade it for anything though. well, ok maybe for a couple things, but at any rate, it certainly beats working, which i'm still not doing yet. i hear that's coming next week. :-p

twisteez

apparently i am all about the twists, when it comes to writing. you see the words 'strand' and 'shoulder', most immediately think of a person. their hair, their body, something like that. and i thought that, too, but then i waited a minute. i stared at the words. then i thought, what about being stranded on a highway shoulder? and from that (and the rest of the prompt) i wrote a fun little snippet yesterday. full of twists and dark humor, which are apparently my native tongues.

taking a moment, to see where my mind pushes me, seriously feels like the best ever. as another example, i just spent the last hour looking through writing prompts. because, you know, i'm here at work and bored shitless, so i'm harvesting writing prompts. i had a lot saved up in bloglines because, apparently, i have trouble writing on min's computer. and my computer is not hooked up yet. haven't found the power cord yet. oops.

anyway, because of this, i haven't been reading anything from my bloglines 'writing' folder. until today, since i'm writing at work, and so i found this.

oh, interesting, i thought. and then a moment later, a twist on that idea had me practically chomping at the bit to write a full blown story. people, i do not write full blown stories. i write snippets. i don't have the patience to write a book. at least, that's how i feel 99% of the time. it will be interesting to see how far this progresses but suffice to say:

this feeling rules.

FlagCreativeWritingAtWork

Enabled, which yes, is weird. i’d rather, i don’t know, work. but in the meantime – yes, tres cool.

a night for the ladeez

work has me in limbo yet again, partly due to my new status, partly due to external issues thwarting regular progress for many folks. which leaves me in a space where i could either read (on the computer, since i forgot my book), or write. i'm tired of reading, apparently, so here's the first in a possibly lengthy series of random posts from yours truly.

last night had 2 great things: my mom, and good food. it is always so wonderful to see her; even when she's miserable, she's still silly and smiling. no wonder pearl loves her more than us. seriously -- she follows my mom to the bathroom.

after catching up for a little bit, we tried to pick a movie and although no one was crazy about it, settled on this, which was playing at the laurelhurst. first, though, was to eat, and being in the mood for japanese, a little research landed us at masa east.

this was seriously some of the best japanese food i've ever had in my life, and having lived in the bay area, i've had some damn good japanese. i had this udon-shitake-scallop soup that was incredibly dreamy. the decor was adorably hip, all of the food so incredibly divine, and the entrees were all around $10. we will absolutely be going back.

incidentally, if you're in the mood for chinese food, do not go to mandarin palace in sw portland off allen. that is the worst faux chinese i've had in decades, so thank god we didn't pay much for it (coupon).

anyway, our tummies delightfully sated, we headed up to the laurelhurst. i had been there several times in my youth, and surprisingly it still looked pretty good... for a secondrun theatre. standing in line to buy tickets, i notice the SOLD OUT sign for our movie. crap. only thing left is some old guys...well, it won some awards, we're here already, it's only been playing for 5 minutes, let's give it a whirl.

so we whirled on into our designated room, apparently after the Impetus For The Entire Film had transpired. luckily min caught the end of it (mom and i had been acquiring liquid sustenance) and filled us in, not that it really mattered, because this movie? a little weak. i will give plenty of kudos to the actual acting. all the major characters, and most of the minor ones, gave pretty solid performances. but the writing, even the art direction...too predictable. there was an occasionally interesting turn of phrase, but that's about it. and the ending, well it was just awkward and sad. realistic, i suppose, and i don't need to have a happy ending for my movies but... i don't know, it just felt like they didn't know how to bow out.

i believe i've mentioned there is a DQ 2 blocks from my house. i also believe i've mentioned regular attendance is compulsory. thus, we stopped for drive-thru dessert, which we enjoyed at home so that pearl could alternately dance all over us and beg, an activity with which we happily complied.

and then i cursed myself for the late-night sugar high, because it took me two hours to go to sleep. even so, as you can see, i'm coherent today. well, at least enough to pretend i am.

a spot of ramble

it was another quiet week at work, with more spells where i actually got to read a book. even weirder, apparently such spells are not abnormal. once i get into a non-training schedule, it will be interesting to see if i can actually write at work. in the meantime, i'm getting paid to read and play scrabulous, plus do a little work, and that ain't shabby, folks.

it's been a mellow weekend too, haven't felt well, but my mom is coming up so we can grab a bite and possibly a movie. probably a 2nd run, still not a lot of scrilla, but it shouldn't be hard to top the last movie i saw, which was the worst book rendition i've ever seen. the book? great. the movie, holy kiwi.

have any of you been in a writing group? i'll be joining one shortly, one that's just starting, and so if you have any advice, give it up. i'm looking forward to some writing accountability -- i know it's the only way i'll write on a regular basis, despite *thinking* about writing every single day. so here's to some caffiene-punctuated progress, since we're meeting at the home of my favorite coffee dispenser, borders.

and what's up with the rest of you? some of you've been a little quiet lately. snowflake's the only one getting a pass, since she hurt her back, poor thing. but the rest of you - speak up!

all in a week's work

[written friday morning]

well it's not even 10am and i'm bored. in fact, i've been bored since i got here 2 hours ago, during which i've had 1 hour of legal compliance training and 1 hour of random but worksafe web surfing to keep me busy. i have potentially hours to waste before my next task -- a test "sometime" today. which means this is a great time to write about my inaugural week here.

the first thing i noticed about being in this office is that it feels *really new*. as in, 'huh? i'm not at my old job?' and repeatedly catching myself from saying FormerCompanyName instead of NewCompanyName.

the second thing i noticed was the lack of free coffee. I AM NOT KIDDING. turns out there is barely passable machine-dispensed caffiene at the other end of this floor for 65 cents, and crappy coffee in the cafe for $1.20, which means i am looking into buying a french press, people. if you have suggestions, toss 'em over; i've never used one but i'm desperate. there *is* a st@rbucks a mile away but that's too pricey considering my intake quotient.

so. for work itself, naturally i've been bored off my ass. i forgot how brutally slow one's first few weeks can be what with setup and training and waiting for busy supervisors to set things up in a timely fashion. and i mean brutal because i have NADD.

i will say though, that monday also included the weekly staff meeting where i got to see how excellent our group's demographics are. young, old, mixed races, genders and (looks like) economic status. coming from several years of rather homogonized yuppified workplaces, well, this is refreshing.

there's been technical and style tests, sure, but also the amount of cheesy compliance training, wow. for example, ethics. i've always maintained that any reputable ethics course will include a calvin coolidge quote. anyone who says otherwise is probably a communist. another good axiom: how do you know the right thing to do? because it's the right thing to do.

it is this kind of logic that leads late night comedians to invent faux fights during a writer's strike.

the other thing to note, i'm sure, has a perfectly valid business reason behind, but is nonetheless disturbing. there are apparently two main types of employees here, and respectively, we have different badges to prove it. i happen to be part of the lower caste (LC) and as such, am forbidden from certain areas. this is in addition to any super-secret areas, mind you, from which plenty of folks are forbidden. no, i am talking about certain rows of the cubicle farm, with warnings that LCs can only enter with a proper escort. and rooms like the fitness center. seriously people - don't you want us ALL to be healthy?

my favorite one, though, was this morning. in looking to kill time, i was browsing the intranet, reading about new company features, etc, and oh look! company blog! that's a good way to amuse myself. but wait! access forbidden because you are an LC. that's right, even my computer knows i'm an LC.

which is pretty damn funny to me because i've read corporate blogs before and i can't believe these would be any full of anything other than the self-congratulatory hot air those blogs are prone to.

even though this leaves me with a lovely separate but mostly equal dichotomy, i am still very grateful to be here. everyone is very nice, and the work, when it finally arrives, looks to be manageable. bring on the scrilla, man.

a query

peeples, how does it get to be 530 in the #*(&$#@ morning already every day? didn't i JUST go to sleep? i ask you.

a more informative post about my return to work will come soon. probably on the weekend, considering my track record for extracurricular activities thusfar. woo.

your bitter ray of sunshine

thanks to rpp and a lack of recent quizzes, i bring you heatherweather, which apparently is conducive to eclipses:

You Are Sunshine

Soothing and calm You are often held up by others as the ideal But too much of you, and they'll get burned You are best known for: your warmth Your dominant state: connecting

What Type of Weather Are You?

a bit of color is good for you

be it goodies a mile down the road, or pretties from my front yard:

seriously, if you live in the portland area, you have to check marco's cafe out. i just had the best lunch ever, and it was just a sandwich and coffee.

incidentally

why yes, valentine's day is the purrrfect time to take down your christmas tree!

on that note, this has been the most fragrant (in a good way), long-lasting tree i've ever had.

if you adore 80's and/or country music, you should seriously consider moving to portland. that or, if you prefer to HUNT for new music on the radio, portland is also a great option.

it is so friggin gorgeous, and i am so utterly happy to be here, that sometimes i can hardly breathe, and yes i felt that way before i got the job. although the incessant jobsearch did drag me down, that happiness was still there.

that is all!

it me, trendsetter

snowflake, identifier of trends and master of scrabulous, wins the prize for identifying an uptick in my direction on the very day that the circle became complete, which is to say:

i got a job. =)

and yes, that is a collective sigh of relief that you're now hearing.

the good news:

i got a job!

a permanent one, even!

at a Big Company! normally i wouldn't care about that, but in our current economy, and certainly within this particular company, that equals more job security.

apparently they are very fond of potluck lunches. free food, always good news.

my new job title includes the word "author".

the mediocre news:

the pay, especially compared to what i'm used to from californy, but still, a liveable salary for up here

the very specific hours (8-5). and i'm whining because i have been SPOILED for the last THREE YEARS, where i normally rolled into work around 1030am. i told you - spoiled.

despite being an "author", the only thing i should be writing is code. yes, code. however, it looks to have junior-level code requirements, so thank god for that. let's just say, there were no interview questions about javascript, and that made me a *very* happy camper.

oh and this is interesting, apparently this place is soooo security conscious that i literally will not step on-site until all my hiring paperwork is complete. as proof, i had my in-person interview at st@rbucks. how can you argue with coffee ubiquity? so i didn't, and the four of us had a very nice, caffeinated chat.

since apparently i am practicing for getting up early (i woke up around 330 today), i decided to, upon proper alertness, alert you all to the good mews. so there you have it, and now i'm off the hook to post for at least a week. ;-)

just kidding

about that other car. turned out, after going through the dealer's shop, that it needed major suspension work. enough to exceed the value of the car. oops.

this is what happens when you get the 'so fresh it hasn't been inspected yet' vehicles.

so, they kept their eye out for us. we came by another time, for another dud, but in the end, we ended up scoring this baby from another dealer entirely:

(bigger)

well, imagine that with 4 doors instead of 2, but yes, that's our little cutie pie and we're totally in love with it so far. a 96 p0ntiac grand @m that just floats along the road.

also, some progress in the medical dept for min, in terms of doctors and trust me that had been a disaster. we lucked into a new, wonderful fellow who's doing a fabulous job taking care of her. not hard to beat the idiots who'd been on board the last few weeks. :-p

in other good news, i had a job interview monday. a single one instead of the many i'd been getting last month, but better than zero. think healthy employment thoughts, eh? i sure need 'em.

in case you wondered

if you have a dairy queen a mere block from your house, you are required to visit it for a tasty morsel at least once a week.

that is all.

good thing i'm not addictive

since i'm still not posting much. you can chalk that up to being more than a little stressed and busy trying to manage my current financial, automotive and employment status. surprise surprise.

well, while i am still without a job, and feeling inordinately frustrated about how long that's taking (and the dwindling opportunities), i am happy to report unexpected progress in the other two categories. out of the blue, a week ago my mom's disability (ssi/ssdi) application got approved, hallelujah! this was out of the blue because, for example, they'd previously said she had to fill out additional paperwork (a few months ago) and my mom hadn't done it yet.

thank god for goverment redundancies, because they approved it anyway, and she got her backpay just a few days ago. this led my parents to loan us some major scrilla -- enough to last us a couple months AND get a replacement car... to replace our saturn, yes, but also the car they'd already lent us...yes, THEIR only car, and no i didn't ask for any of that! we were having dinner with my mom and she said, 'i knew there was only one reason for this money to come now. it came for you.'

i really don't like entertaining what we'd have had to do if this money had NOT come. so i won't. i will just say thank you, thank you so much, and try to keep being worth this kind of reward.

i wanted to get a replacement car quickly for two reasons:

1. my parents deserve their car back, especially since it takes us 45 minutes to get there if an errand needs a'runnin.
2. i hate driving their car. it's old, and it complains every way it can, routinely offending some combination of visual, auditory and olfactory senses.

being the penny pincher that i am, i had initially planned to spend only a thousand bucks on a new car. yes i know that means i'd get a crappy car. i don't care, i just need one to last a few months til i can get another one. well, long story short, we spent closer to 2, and this is what we got instead:



it's a 95 0ldsmobile aurora and yes it comes with the sunny backsplash. after all, it does rain here. it's not in perfect condition -- it is old, and has more miles than i'd like -- but for the most part, and especially for its age, it does seem in rather shiny condition. it's being prepped for final departure from the dealer, who's giving it a tune-up and finessing other fiddly bits before turning it over to us next week. i have never heard of a dealer doing this on a used car, but it's made me very glad we went there instead of Joe's Used Car Lot, where the surprises would come a la carte, post-purchase.

so. i'm tired, and barring the lack of job or (yay) medical issues in our household (which i am too annoyed to elaborate on), i'm happy. i'm happy and i feel incredibly grateful to be here, and to know that LBJ is surely keepin' an eye out for me and mine. and with that i'm going to bed to read. :)

enjoying the silence?

i know, after a bout of touretting i've been silent for 10 days. you can chalk that up to:

- a plethora of job interviews. a very good reason to be silent, no?
- listing, selling, packaging and shipping a variety of books, cds and dvds, to earn some scrilla
- a car accident

no one is hurt except for the car, which is in the shop as we speak. this happened friday night whilst min was making her way to whole f00ds. she was at a 3-way stop and apparently one of these people felt it was taking too long to go, so the person behind them (90 degrees to m's right) zipped around and plowed into the right side of our car.

thank god i stayed home, since that's right where i'd have been sitting.

the best part is that due to some credit card snafus (which some of you may recall), it turned out our car insurance had lapsed. not that we knew that at the time, though that's just for the best since she'd have been ticketed for it. it's being remedied now but suffice to say, we'll have to pay to get the car fixed, instead of insurance paying. this is doing wonders for my budding ulcer, in case you were curious.

i wasn't going to write about all this yet - maybe wait until tomorrow, which is currently unbooked - but the morning interview i had scheduled was cancelled on account of ice. which makes it the perfect time to blab to the internet.

and how are you doing?

for those who are about to withdraw, i salute you

i landed on the couch, with my dinner, around 715pm tonight, and went in search of something to hold my attention while munching.

normally political debate does not hold my attention. while i enjoy political discussion now and then (and political lampooning, always), it's usually boring as shit.

but tonight's new hampshire debate was not. it was insightful, smart, ridiculous, fascinating, and all around entertaining, in more ways than one.

and now, a 30-second summation of each candidate's performance.

THE LONG-SNOUTED TRUMPETERS
(Giganticus Elephantia Republicannis)

McCain - Way to call Romney a liar, to his face. I call Celebrity Death Match!
Thompson - Go back to acting, where you can only ramble due to a bad script. Please.
Paul - Maybe you should try acting. Have Thompson get you a gig on L&O, and you can ramble together. I like you for a passionate prosecutor who throws the case due to sudden-onset Alzheimer's.
Romney - Congratulations on your ability to deflect/not answer questions until you've been asked them 10 times! That takes skill, man.
Huckabee - Good thing your name stands out. Not much else does.
Giuliani - I know about terror and healthcare and zzzZZZZ

THE HEE-NAWS
(Melodromaticus Donkeyito Democratinum)

Edwards - Congratulations on announcing the Edwards-Obama ticket!
Obama - Congratulations on announcing the Obama-Edwards ticket!
Richardson - Are you through yet? I can't tell when you've finished a thought.
Clinton - Thanks for letting us see your feelings -- the good ones, and the not-so-flattering ones, too.

thank god for the political process. four hours of entertainment, for free! well, after sponsorship by facebook, abc and someone else, but hey, if the corporations and celebrities don't bring me my candidates, then i don't know how i'm supposed to make an informed decision.

yay for the free market!

reason #4007 i love futurama

4007. morbo and kittens

the daily grind

this morning i did something i rarely do -- i called a company i interviewed with a few weeks back, to see what the status was. i had been told, while there, that i'd be contacted before the end of the year. i really wanted this job, so in case they passed on me (and being january now, i assumed they had), i wanted to see if they thought there was some area i could improve in, for future openings in this area. i have had a positive response to this before, so i figured what the hell.

turns out the hiring for that position was frozen. and they were going to hire four people! while that sucks a lot for me of course, in a way i almost feel just as bad for them. you thought four people were coming, and now you get zero. nyah nyah.

they did tell me that the hiring might thaw next month, so that's good. meantime i continue, as ever, the elusive search for employment, and as i look through the mediocre postings today, i find that nothing moves me. oh, don't get me wrong, after i finish this post i'll be applying to four positions. but i can't get excited about them (one i could, if only it were FT), and maybe it's that coupled with knowing this next week i have two interviews for web hackish positions (which i'm also having difficulty feigning interest in) that's just making this morning a bit bummerish.

i'm glad my parents are coming over today for a belated new year's of grubbing, gaming, and giggling. i can tell i need it.

merry new year!

if you get that quote, then i love you a little extra.

new year's eve is a time to reflect on the past year. well, that and get drunk. you will have to BYOB, but in the interests of efficiency, i am going to reflect on a very narrow window, a.k.a. November's Adventures, albeit in a slightly truncated fashion. i wrote most of these bits out weeks ago now, and frankly i'm a little bored with them. they do have a lot to live up to, though, what with the excitement of actually getting *to* oregon.

and now, the short, short version (at least parts of it):

sat nov 10 - moved to la quinta inn, wilsonville. saw some reeeeally crappy houses off of hwy 26.

sun nov 11- under clouds whose bark was worse than their bite, unloaded the monstrosity into a storage unit, with the help of 3 wonderful fellows from craigsliszt (CL, i love you!). turned in the monstrosity with gigantic sighs of relief.

sidebar: there just started being some POPping outside. it took me about 5 minute to figure out those were fireworks. am i tired? you be the judge.

mon nov 12 – hopped up, got some stellar (not kidding) free breakfast at the hotel, then set to house hunting! I was very annoyed because we didn’t leave til 2pm, and it starts getting dark around 430. hello northerners!

Our first stop was in Portland, near Tigard off 217. we’re driving along and oops – missed our turn. Make a left into the next street, to turn around, when hello! There’s a house for rent right at the corner. Actually a duplex, a nice looking, cream-colored townhouse, and the half not facing busyish oleson road.

Naturally we go to check it out. The first thing we noticed was an adorably landscaped garden. It was filled with a dozen or so bird houses, creeping ivy, berried shrubs, moss (I love you), and a winding path leading to a (Japanese elm? Maple?) tree, framed around a deck with aridondack chairs and hundreds of minature gold, orange and red leaves blanketing the entire scene. From the deck we could see the kitchen, dining/living room, bedroom plus staircase leading to at least one more bedroom (2, turned out). It was light, airy, vaulted ceilings, a fireplace and as a package, entirely cozy.

So, charmed, m called the # listed outside. 3br, 1.5ba AND affordable. No pets? How about you think up the most you might need to repair pet damage, and we’ll pay that as a deposit? Ok then! We’ll leave our rental resume for you under the locked breezeway.

Oh now it looks like there are a couple of tweaks needed to said resume. Specifically, a cover letter and a few minor changes. Plus, we needed more copies for other folks. So, down to kinko’s (saw one en route, woo!) to finish our paperwork.

Which was all a necessary evil but by the time we were all done and that dropped back off, it was after 5 – too dark to see any more. Did we go to the hotel? Visit my parents? God knows.

tues/weds nov 13/14 - more house- and job-hunting, which included:
- crappy houses
- beautiful houses
- getting lost
- signing away our life on credit releases, etc
- finally seeing the loser cabin we'd been headed to on monday. tip: it is not good when you can smell mildew from the outside.
- got turned down for the job i'd interviewed for the previous thursday, however, would i mind interviewing tomorrow at 9am for a junior version of that job? sigh. ok.
- called back a guy who'd called me 3 weeks prior (an interview i'd had to reschedule due to our bank snafus), and got a new interview - 1pm - for the same position.

and with that, i will wish you all the best for 2008, during which i promise to wrap up this saga.

another year of a-muse-ment

somehow fitting to have a pun in there. anyway, i finally found a meme i could get behind, from rpp. i don't have to think (which is great, since it's late), i only have to collect data in a bizarrely meaningful fashion. so without further adieu, here are the first lines from the first post of each month this year:

January: thanks to rashenbo:
February: lately i have been completely overwhelmed with a desire to return home. and by home, i mean oregon.
March: i'm sure it's all those answers about reading books that did me in...
April: this just in!
May: in my last post i mentioned someday writing a book based on my particular brand of crazy.
June: i got this from wen the other day.
July: although i am, in fact, working on my boston post.
August: it can happen, folks. at least in your head.
September: that was the title of the skype chat we had going all night during last week's live code push at work, and yes i came up with the title, and yes i purposely mispelled kegger.
October: i am tired.
November: i'll post a more comprehensive update in the future, of course, but suffice to say:
December: as evidenced by this shot:

from this i surmise i need to work on my use of colons, and also stop doing memes or quizzes at the beginning of the month. anyway, if anyone is interested in doing this, consider yourself tagged!

and now you'll have to excuse me, i'm off to finish watching the lovely dana scully and fall asleep. night!

The Great Escape '07 (part 3)

before i dive into this, i hope you all are having a wonderful holiday season! i am having a wonderful one so far, replete with homemade sugar cookies (a bout at mom's, with much silliness), a couple of santa drivebys and (today) cleaning+tree trimming. pretty good set there.

ok, back to the misadventures. heads up, the previous two days were more exciting, but still, it's good to write this out. =)

Wed nov 7 – I slept so hard, I don’t remember sleeping. But as usual, I was the first one up, so I checked on the kitties – cozy in a very large bathroom – and took pearl out.

Her goal: place the Pearl Stamp of Approval on the grass
My goal: See if I was still the jam in someone’s Unwieldy Truck Jelly Roll.

My 18-inch neighbor was vamanos – yay! However the horse buggy was still right next to me, which left me hoping they would checkout today before 11am. Which they did, thank the Jesus. Oh and before we left, I got a call moving my Thursday interview in Portland (yes, the next day, yes I didn’t mention this interview before) from 4pm to 3pm. Ok fine.

When we finally hit the road around 11, I notice my arms are still so damn sore from moving/packing that I feel like I can barely hold onto the wheel. And oh, do I have to hold on! That thing was so damn sensitive, I had to correct constantly. And yes, except for a minor blip (tune in later), I did all the driving. Min was sansa-driving license, remember?

We stopped in Redding (?) for some warmer clothes for m, and interview clothes+shoes for me (all packed, of course), at a fabulously fashionable walmart. Considering my aversion to polyester and rayon, I think I fared pretty well. Oh, and got a better cat litter box. M had got a ‘travel’ one – hey, we’re traveling – but did not take into account dolce’s penchant for Vigorous Self Expression. I’d cleaned the Vigorous Aftermath that morning, so when we pulled into wallyworld I nicely commanded her to get a litter box with a lid.

By the time we finished it was about 630 and I was stressed. We *had* to get to Salem tonight – interview tomorrow! Bleh. We tooled over to mcd’s for some grub and then with min at the wheel (me: just a wee bit tired), we headed north once again.

Somewhere between Medford and Roseburg we began to get low on gas. Being as a) you can’t pull in just anywhere with a beast like this, b) there’s very few gas stations along that route, c) especially when it’s after 10pm, let’s just say there were severall unsuccessful rounds, resulting in numerous prayers.

OH and right around then, pearl started panting like crazy, shaking and periodically tapping on arms. The last bit means she wants something, like to go outside. Ok fine. We stop. No puppy action. After a bit I theorize it’s the truck, the movement. She wants us to stop, period.

Which isn’t happening so all we can do is try to soothe her, and that sort of worked. When we finally rolled into Roseburg on fumes, and it took 15 minutes alone – and about $150 – to fill up the tank, plus bathroom/food breaks for everyone, we ended up with a half hour break and a completely mellowed pearl. Thank god.

I got back at the wheel and was perfectly alert, and pearl perfectly mellow, until about 20 minutes before salem. We made it though, and couldn’t figure out where to park the truck at first, but Crosslands Hotel Lobby Man said the semis usually fit out back. Back? After we finished I looked and though I had to navigate a narrow entrance, out back was plenty big.

And thus, by about 2am, we were all packed away into the hotel room, on our way to snoozville.

Thu nov 8 – Interview’s at 3, but I got up at 9. Why? Because before then I had to:

- Find out if I could return the car tow dolly in salem. If yes, yay! If not, have to figure out where in Portland, and do THAT today, because I could NOT drive and park the whole caboodle downtown.
- Turn in the dolly in salem – yay!
- Repark the de-dollied truck
- Get some SBC goodness (hello!)
- Go to a kinko’s to 1) print copies of my resume, which thank god I’d thought to send to my gmail acct before I left, and 2) map how to get to my interview
- Get lunch
- Drive the 45 min/hour to the interview, making sure to get there about 20 minutes early (just in case)

I actually got there 30 minutes early, which was fine since I like having time to go over the job description and resume just beforehand. It also gave me time to come up with a brilliant idea on how to deal with the credit card I’D JUST LOST. Yes, the same one that was our ONLY one. Those friggin mediocre pants from wallyworld – very shallow pockets. Which is why I put only the card in there, not my whole wallet. Which is why it still fell out, though.

Anyway – brilliant idea? Get my mom’s card. Because a couple of years ago I opened an account for my mom, with my name on it. I forget why she doesn’t have her name on it – odd. But since the account’s mine, my name everywhere, presto! Problem solved until my replacement card can arrive.

The interview went fine. The recruiters met me there ahead of time – nice guys, if mildly tense. Sort of like salesmen, hoping the deal goes through. Makes sense, I guess, I just never had recruiters meet me at an interview site. And the people in the office – also mildly tense. Cordial, rather than friendly. I could tell some of my answers weren’t thrilling my interviewer (it is pointless to lie in an interview, in my opinion) but other answers were quite bewitching. Who knew localization was such a hot topic?

So, a mixed bag. Afterwards I headed to Salem, where we planned to meet my parents at mcgrath’s. Turned out it was just my mom – dad was too sick. It was so good to see her, to know we were here for good, that this was the first of many meals. M and my mom commiserated a lot about their state of being – both sick, in completely different ways, but the result is the same. They both struggle a great deal with who they used to be – ‘power women’ – and how they barely have the energy (physical or otherwise) to do much anymore.

I felt really glad for the both of them, that they’d just had an informal group therapy session. It’s hard to talk to other people about these things – even for me, as a spectator, it’s sometimes draining on an awfully personal, pervasive level. And I’m not even the incapacitated one. Anyway, we talked til I was falling asleep, then drove back to the hotel. Zzzzzzzzzz

Fri nov 9 – Honest to god I don’t remember the first half of this day. The first thing I recall is arranging to meet my parents at marie calendar’s for a late lunch, about 230. At 245 my mom calls to say dad has fallen and he can’t get up. Seriously. Ambulance en route. She says not to follow yet – she’ll call after he gets seen in the ER.

So, we ate, then went to the thrift store I’d noticed earlier, because if we thought it was cold in redding, holy shit it was freezing in salem. It was just in the 40’s but hello! Came from where it was in the 70’s. and sunny instead of freezing, windy rain. So, time to get m a bigger coat – a great one actually, for just $15. While there, my mom called to say that dad had broken his hip. They’d operate tonight but didn’t know when yet, so she’d call again after he (likely) got moved to a room and we could visit.

Bout an hour later – round 7 – we were back at the hotel when my mom’s call came in. M was getting sleepy, so I went by myself and got there a little after 8. Why so long? Because en route, I stopped at kinko’s. On Sunday we needed to unload the behemoth into a storage unit, and no way I was doing that by myself. I posted on CL, then called my mom to see if she needed dinner. Yep. So I popped over to wendy’s and got us some grub, then headed over to the hospital.

My poor dad. He hadn’t been given any pain relief for about about 5 hours, which doesn’t sound like a lot unless you’ve, I don’t know, broken a hip and normally have a shitload of pain on a daily basis already. Apparently they kept waiting for the pharmacy to actually fill the order. Great, thanks.

Meantime they put his leg in traction (woo, more pain!) and kept waiting to hear when surgery would happen. Lots of buzzing about, who knows what’s happening, but my dad was suuuper chatty, which is not like him. Adrenaline/distraction, I guess. He went on and on about what a great day he and min had one time, down in santa cruz, probably 2 years ago. You be sure to tell her I said that, ok? Ok! And that was the last thing he said before they wheeled him out, because hello! Aaround 930 a tech suddenly came to whisk him away for surgery. Alright, guess we’re on!

I walked downstairs with my mom, hugged her goodbye and then drove back to kinko’s again. Why? Because in those 2 hours or so, I must’ve gotten 20 calls about loading help on Sunday, and I had to stop my phone from incessantly ringing, so I deleted the CL post. On the way back to the hotel, I felt like I could hardly think, I was so exhausted. So guess what happened? Zzzzzzz

ah, bibliophilia

i love the library.
books upon books
any and all for me
and ALL for free, provided i return (or renew!) them accordingly.

i was let loose for 20 minutes and gleefully came home with 8 books in a variety of genres. pure bliss, i tell you.

p.s. yes, i know i'm a geek. the trick is being enough of a book whore that i don't mind being called a geek.
p.p.s. yes, i've mastered that trick.

the difference between $9/hr and...

well let's just say "significantly more than $9/hr", which for now represents my "normal going rate". anyway, i am at that point where, as long as a temporary job is close by (less than 10 miles, let's say) and parking is free, i'm willing to take a drastic, temporary pay cut so that we have money for things like, i don't know, food.

yes, next month's rent is covered. so are a few other things for the next several weeks, so we're ok, and i'm working very hard, as you might guess, to get a "regular" job. have an interview scheduled next week with someone very Technologically Prominent, so think lots of good thoughts for me. but in the meantime, in order to have a merry - instead of somewhat begruding - christmas, i've procured a temporary gig for a whopping $9/hr.

are you loving the run-on sentence fetish i apparently have tonight? i know i am.

anyway, i'm two days into this (supposed) four day gig and as you might guess, it involves some manual labor so suffice to say, i am tired. why'm i writing then? well apparently i feel a need to write, but also take a break from The Great Moving Escapades of 2007. although in another way, this is part of all that, too.

so. first temporary gig was supposed to be gift wrapping. i really liked the idea of that, because a) it was from 330-midnight, allowing me to interview during the day if i chose, b) i ADORE gift wrapping and c) i am good at it. however, that job was cancelled the next day (way to plan ahead). that same next day (confused?), there was a post for letter stuffing.

amazingly, this is something i have experience with, and no i am not talking about cramming a day's junk mail into one envelope en route to the garbage. a billion (ok, 9) years ago, in november, after we moved to california from montana and were struggling to find regular employment, our temp agency called with a great-sounding opportunity -- good scrilla for letter stuffing.

the job was in santa cruz, in a dark, drafty old barn (right around here, for those of you familiar with the area), and btw drafty is a euphemism for "bone-chillingly cold and persistent gusts of wind".

to add to its charm, this job was accompanied by
- surly employees
- overbearing, nitpicking and even surlier managers
- a dearth of chairs

this last item in particular, plus the poor ergonomic planning overall, was the real killer. i worked my ass -- well, arms, fingers and back -- off for 4 hours and finally had to call it quits. the repetitive motion with the arms, sure that sucks. reaching all the time, yeah that's difficult, too, if you're doing the same thing over and over. but also while standing in a 3 foot space? with no seat or break? and managers hovering constantly in the darkness behind you?

so you can see why i might've approached this job with some trepidation. but i am very happy to say that the only thing these two jobs seem to have in common is that there is letter stuffing-related activities going on. the boss man here, very mellow. there's a plethora of chairs, room -- and time -- to work, we got the tunes going, and for the most part, my cohorts (3 others were hired at the same time) are delightful to work with. i think it's the 'most part' bit that probably has me writing tonight, really, and here's why:

yesterday (day 1), when we came back from lunch, the very nice woman (VNW) i'd been working with asked, 'did i eat?' i was a little startled - i'd told her earlier that i brought my lunch - but replied, 'yep!'

VNW then went and asked the lone male cohort (LMC) if he had eaten over the break.

no, LMC said, shaking his head.

VNW proceeds to offer half her sandwich to LMC. he accepts, and as he munches, i swear his face was sheer gratitude. i then immediately thought of the furniture we still need help moving upstairs (feel free to laugh), and of possibly offering him $20 - when this job ends - to come and serve as moving muscle for a (maximum) hour's worth of work. tried to get someone before but they flaked so - hey, i'll give it to someone who's more desperate, yeah? i mean, he doesn't even have enough food to eat.

this (observing) was my sole interaction with LMC until today, day 2. well, other than observing him being verrry chatty with the other female cohort, all day yesterday. okay, today -- more of the same chattiness until it happens that he and i end up being seated near each other, when he lapses into almost complete silence.

naturally LMC can't match for my capacity for being mute, and ultimately begins talking to me, but even then it's still quite mundane. this results in amiable silence for a couple hours.

now it's 10 minutes before 5 -- quitting time. LMC has finished his activity and goes over to in-charge guy to ask for a quick task, since it's almost time to go. in-charge guy goes, 'well there's this bin that got sorted in reverse, you could switch it around like so (demonstrates) so that this is in descending order.'

i catch the last end of this and, realizing he's talking about a bin that *i* had done (twas the first one i'd done by myself -- i'd been responsible for other parts of the process, previously), walk over to say, 'oh, did i do that one in the wrong order?'

in-charge guy says, 'yeah, it's no big deal, it'll just take a few minutes to fix.' he nods and pushes the bin towards LMC.

LMC immediately turns to me and says, 'well actually, since you screwed this one up, why don't you fix it, and i'll go take over your pasting job.'

i may have smirked, sneered, or even smiled, i don't know. what i said was, 'sure, no problem.' because it was my mistake, and plus, i could care less what letter-related task i'm actually doing -- it's all tedium.

but what i thought was, you ass. you just screwed yourself out of $20. because seriously, if you think that by somehow trying to malign my 'worthiness' as a temporary $9/hr employee, by speaking in a condescending manner to me in front of our junior supervisor, is going to somehow ... affect my employment? make me do better? be extra nice (instead of merely courteous) to you?

i don't think so.

i get sunday off. woo! hopefully there will be a mix of chores and some christmas-related activities. maybe even - dare i say it - books. *swoon*

for the love of beef

in more recent news, today
on the way
to safeway:

i "steered" through a juicy part of town, aka beef bend road.

incidentally, bull mountain road is also nearby, lest
you think i jest.

and on a deli sign:
EVERYONE LOVES BBQ
EXCEPT THE PIG

until the next meaty installment,
heather

imitation of life

Min got back yesterday. Back, you say? Yes, back from a 15-day jaunt to Tucson, because her niece Wendy was finally released from prison! For those of you just joining, she did a 7 year stint for vehicular manslaughter as a result of DUI, and in Arizona, normally the minimum – even for first timers like Wendy – is 25 years. She had to bargain to get 7. Anyway, because of M’s lack of current photo ID, her options dwindled down to Greyhound. Technically they require it too, but I said, ‘Let’s just go down, buy a ticket and see if it’s really required.’ Turned out no. I even asked, just to be sure. Company line – nyah nyah!

I'm glad she's here for many reasons, the least of which is calming Pearl (so anxious, that one) and apparently instigating movement on my job prospects. 4 pings in the last day, after weeks of nothing. Hello, and thank you!

And now, back to recapping. We start at Tuesday, November 6th, a day of being proven by fire if ever there was one.

11.6 – Set wakeup call for 7am because we have to 1) get up 2) eat (thank you, room service!) 3) get pearl to the groomer and 4) get to the house by 830am and wrap up/grab our last few things because 5) at 9am the cleaners arrive.

So, we ate, zoomed and made it to the house by 845. Thankfully (sort of), the cleaners didn’t arrive til 930 because we really did need that time to pack up the cats (who spent the first of many semi-quiet nights in a bathroom), our remaining crap and head out. M talked to the cleaners while I wrapped up, then we were off on our day of fiscal adventures.

First, though, it was back to the hotel to shower, pack that shit up and park it with the valet until we were ready to depart for the day – theoretically, around 2pm. Planned to go the bank after we checked out but hey! It’s time to meet the landlords now AND we don’t have the truck moved yet.

Yeah hi. 24 foot truck aqui en el stupido drivewayo. However, we (I can’t remember whose idea this was) had brilliantly thought ahead and called Adrian, man who made sure our shit fit in that beast, could come and back that beast up. You have no idea how freaked I was about fucking up the stone entrance to the driveway (or damaging the truck), not to mention how god-awful long it’d take. So we called, asked, do you drive trucks too? Would you drive ours out and down the street for $20 (better than $10/hr day before)? Why sure!

However, Adrian was running late and wouldn’t be there til a little after 12, and our walkthrough with the landlords was at 12. Sigh. Ok. Oh, and the cleaners, who said the house would just take 2 hours tops, they still hadn’t called to give us our 30 minute ‘almost finished!’ call and yes, it was 1145am now.

Sigh. I feel so tired, just remembering all this. We get to the house right before 12. I’m doing something – god knows what – while m checks with the cleaners to see how it’s going. Maybe I called Adrian. Anyway, cleaning guy says all is well, almost done, maybe by 1230? But also btw, did you know the kitchen sink doesn’t drain?

Huh?

The sink is full of about 4 inches of dirty water. M says, when you were cleaning, did you put everything in there? Where’s your mop bucket?

Bucket? No no no, look at the disposal, it doesn’t work, see, it’s not my fault. Cleaning guy flicks the disposal switch for emphasis.

Well I could’ve told you that was broken, but the sink's always drained fine as long as you don’t, say, fill it with crap. And having a bucket, if you’re a cleaner, is that rocket science? As is calling to say, hi, the sink doesn’t work and by the way we’re running late? What do I know though?

M runs to the hardware store to get a bucket and something to clear the drain. I wait with much joy for Adrian, and the landlords, to arrive at our still slightly dirty house. Landlords arrive about 12, and I ask them to come back about 1230 when the house should be done for reals. I say nothing about the drain.

A few minutes later, cleaning guy comes out – presto! Drain has cleared. Huh? How? Apparently he pushed on it (demonstrates with both hands for emphasis) a few times and boom! Down it goes.

Well ok then. I try to call m, tell her nevermind but reception’s always been shitty around that house so I don’t get thru. I go and check on the kitties in the car, a shady spot down the way. They’re fine. I come back and the landlords are back, too. We talk a minute until min arrives, and now the cleaners really are done. I write a check while min goes and does a quick check of their work.

Now the landlords. Turns out the wife used to be a professional housecleaner. Oops. So she notices every bloody thing that these cleaners missed (which turns out was quite a bit). It’s kind of amazing a) how many places dirt can hide and b) how you don’t notice that when you’re exhausted beyond belief and c) this is still probably the cleanest the house has been in years. But we trudge along through Nitpick City, me figuring we’ll get nothing back in our deposit. Meantime Adrian arrives, so I go out to greet him, show him where to park his car, the truck, and then he heads out to repark his car.

I head back inside to find m almost (and moments later, truly) crying. I can tell there’s been more tsking and m has taken it personally (sort of hard not to) plus hi, we’re a little stressed. Wife pipes up – I’m not upset with you, it’s these cleaners!
I think, yeah but if that fucks our deposit (can you say ‘foreshadowing’?) then that’s still bad for us, so same difference in the end. But what I say, while holding a sobbing m, is, I know, but this is just the straw. There’s the trouble with the bank, she lost her wallet, plus regular moving stress – this is just the straw. M quiets, and the landlords become super sweet, and then I go back out to help guide Adrian with the truck.

Landlord Husband comes a minute later, helping to stop traffic/guide on the other side of the street, but seriously – that $20 I spent to have Adrian back that truck out? Best $20 ever. And I said as much to Husband the TWO MINUTES LATER that Adrian had taken, start to finish, in getting that truck out and driving down the street. Sure, it was a 3 point turn. It was a narrow-ass driveway. But a 3 point turn compared to my, oh, 20 point turn? Oh god. So good.

By about 130 we about wrapped up the walkthrough. Apparently there were only minor gripes, so not much impact to our deposit. fine. At this point I almost could care less, I was so tired. As we’re about to leave, I get a call from wamu. Huh? You know this is fucked up, what you’re doing? You’re going to look into it and get back to me asap? Well thank you! Since my account’s due to be closed tomorrow, thanks!

Meantime m got the check from Husband for the extra $180 in rent that we’d paid, and off we went to cash that, plus hopefully get more scrilla, at the bank. Once at said bank, it turned out that without some photo id, there was no way for m to withdraw funds. However, the manager took a little pity on her and agreed to cash the $180 check.

Then I said fine, time for plan b – writing a check on m’s account, to me, and cash it at the Cash Checking Miracle Station. Drove over, walked in, checked for a $ limit on 2 party checks (none) and then went out and had m write a $1500 check. Went back inside, flashed my id, waited, waited…and about 3pm, was denied my miracle. Why? ‘the bank just said no – no specific reason given’. Super.

Well, maybe the bank will cash it for me. It’s her account there, we just talked to them, so if we go back, maybe they’ll give it to me (like this) even though I can’t use my bank card as a form of id since my account’s all flagged and shit.

Turns out that is true. However you also need a secondary id – only from the approved list – and I had none on me. In the truck, sure. Probably right over the cab.

Fuck. Meanwhile, m had wandered off, it seems, and was talking to a banker at a Real Desk. Not knowing what was going on and figuring it’s best to stay out of it, I sat down for about 30 seconds before m called me over. She explained a bit, but very briefly and cryptically. The banker was just as forthcoming, and apparently on intermittent hold with someone in the scrilla industry.

Which is why I spent the next 30 minutes in relative silence and confusion. Periodically I’d say something little to m, or the banker would, but I could tell we were all in some sort of fiduciary trance. Meantime I kept trying to come up with other ideas to get us out of town safely, then rejected each idea a few minutes later. Panic pretty much coursed through my veins though because at this point we were homeless, with 3 animals, a car, a gigantic truck, and no way to access funds in EITHER of our bank accounts. Sure, when a replacement bank card came for m in 7-10 days we’d be able to get to her $, but meantime??

Thankfully I never had to figure out how to deal with that because about 440pm, beautiful banker lady (BBL) (hee) finally got fucking wells fargo to confirm, thru wamu’s internal process, payment of the final payroll checks n my account. Which meant wahooo!! I had a working bank account and credit card again. Which meant we had scrilla to spare and could go get pearl before the groomery closed at 5, finally pick up the car tow dolly, and get the hell out of dodge.

I found out later that m had just walked up to BBL, told her our story (top to bottom), BBL said sorry, can’t help. so m pleaded with her, please, couldn’t she just try to look into it? At which point BBL agreed and at the end of that marvelous fiasco, as we were extracting fundage from my account, m told me she’d seen it work in a movie on tv. Best testimonial for life imitating art, ever.

And so it was that after getting pearl, the dolly, and a good, semi-quick dinner at panera bread, we finally and literally hit the road about 730pm. Our first night’s goal was redding and as you might guess, that didn’t happen. Turns out the car dolly has a top speed of 45mph, officially. Unofficially, I’ve seen them go up to 60mph for very limited periods with no problem. But we started at night, and mostly on very bumpy roads, and the noise from it was so loud I thought the car was going to fly right off. Being nighttime, though, I couldn’t tell how much the car was really moving, but since we’d had to keep the cats in the car (in a nicely wedged, oversized kennel), I was freaked out on their behalf.

Couple my anxiety with the Bumpiest Show On Earth and a very exhausted me, and you will get an impromptu stop at a best western in dunnigan around 130am. Luckily the BW had a) wonderfully large but cheap, clean rooms and b) had plentious truck parking, because in my attempt to give myself enough room to swing the truck around (reverse+tow = verboten) in the morning, all the while looking to the right, apparently I needed to look left, too. I discovered this after I parked, exited and found the back of our truck was a mere 12-18 inches from a semi.

I thought about trying to do something about it after we’d gotten checked in, the cats inside, but in the meantime, a truck+horse trailer parked right beside me, leaving NO room to turn, even in the morning. I was pretty freaked, but there was also nothing I could do about it, so I went to bed, hoping for the best tomorrow.

happy holidays!

i haven't decorated - and who knows how much i will, considering the state of this house - but that doesn't squelch my holiday spirit at all, as proven by this quiz, and this pic i couldn't resist taking last night.

What The Holidays Mean to You

For you, the holidays are about celebration. You enjoy all the fun and fellowship that the holidays bring. You celebrate the holidays in an over the top style. If something is cute, you'll buy it. People end up with a lot of gifts from you - and your house is like a holiday wonderland, full of decorations. During the holidays, you feel magical. You love all of the decorations and how happy people are. You like to sit back and take it all in. You think the holidays should be nostalgic and sweet. The holidays bring out your inner child. Your best holiday memories are of childhood foods and traditions. You secretly still wish you believed in Santa Claus.

What Do the Holidays Mean to You?

i also took the What Holiday Are You? quiz. guess which one i was? i'll give you a hint: it's in late december.

green makes me happy

as evidenced by this shot:

which was taken oh, 100 feet from where i'm typing. while there are plenty more pictures coming eventually, suffice to say that to my right is the 2nd half of this duplex, to my left is our amazingly verdant garden, a fence, and then a good mile or so of park, including the moss, leaves and trees seen above.

and while it may not be easy for kermit to be green, it's very easy for oregon because hello rain! it snowed a bit saturday morning and has been raining ever since. good thing i like rain.

what i also love is the internet, finally coming to my house. as well as the phone and cable. all three of those (well, mostly the first two) make it so much easier to look for and get a job. yes, i don't have one yet, yes i'm a little stressed about it but also this last month and a half has been full of so many miracles, i also have plenty of faith. for now, that plus the work of searching means i feel alright.

and so yes, it's been a little over a month since i had substansive updates. which means yes, YOI (ye olde internet) will soon be the recipient of substansive updates! and by soon i mean:

fri oct 19 – Last day of work

thu oct 25 – Realize bank account is fucked

sat oct 27-mon oct 29 – Rescheduling the earth because bank account is still f'd. Also order 401k disbursement on saturday since I realize the bank account may not be unf'd by the 7th, as wamu is currently predicting, and without that there's no way we can make our trip. Stay #1 in Beverly Heritage Hotel (BevHo!) on the 29th, because we prepaid. Oops.

Mon oct 29-thu nov 1 – Surprise, lots of packing. Additional lunch with liz, additional doc visits.

Fri nov 2 – 401k check arrives. Find check cashing place since I don’t trust screwU to not fuck up m’s account with it (either via depositing or cashing it directly). Wait forever at check cashing place, get freaked when at first they can’t authenticate with charles schwab. Notice insta-credit card option while waiting, as well as 1 and 2 party check cashing. Check clears – call landlord, truck, etc and set new exit date of nov 6. Put scrilla in m’s account – the only unfrozen one between us.

Sat nov 3 – More packing, rescheduling.

Sun nov 4 – Pick up the truck at 11. What a monstrosity. Takes so long (2 main tries, with a 2nd round of 10-15 minutes of grueling, slightly-scraping tension) that the cops come by to say – get this off the street or we’ll be back. Do you think I planned to leave the ass of this thing hanging out?

Meantime there’s minor skirmishes among the troops, but in the end thankfully all calmed down and around 1215 or so, we went to work on a house that was not fully packed. We got a lot done, though – min, me, liz, and a guy from craigsliszt (CL) whose name I’ve forgotten already but he sorta looked like AJ from the backstreet boys. Never heard from my 2nd CL guy, lover of pizza, flaker of gigs.

Liz left about 3, AJ got sent home by 5 with an agreement to come back the next day. Yay! Lori and Aaron came over in the evening and helped a little. Really appreciated it, too, when Lori said she’d be over early (10am) to help with the monumental hordes of items still to be packed.

Mon nov 5 – We’re supposed to be gone – ptoo! - by 2pm today, because that’s when the cleaners come. Which as you might guess, means the house has to be empty by then. We’d arranged for AJ and a friend of his to be there by 11am, figuring what with getting up at 8am ourselves, and Lori there at 10, maybe we’ll be ok. Well, we got up at 8...

Min went out for bottled water and god knows what (but whats that we needed) about 1030. at 11, still not back and no sign of lori or AJ, I called M. Where are you? Has lori called? Holy shit there’s no way we’re getting this done. Should we call someone else?

A few minutes later AJ called – car trouble but he’s coming soon. I decide to call Adrian, moving guy (another one of my CL respondents). Says he can be there by 12. Min gets home a little after 11, says she talked to lori. Apparently lori needed a breathing treatment (self-distributed) and would be at our place in a while.

Back to packing. AJ shows up a few minutes later and after we talk, he starts repacking the truck so all can be squoze in. around 1215, with no Adrian or lori (who I’ve given up on), I call Adrian again. Coming? Yes.

Adrian arrives around 1230, and after a thorough assessment of the entire house and truck, helps AJ redistribute the truck even more. Lori arrives in a face mask (this house seriously collected dust; there was widespread sneezing) a few minutes later, much to my surprise.

Right about then I realize I need to eat, so we get everyone’s order. M goes for food, and I put lori to work I the bathroom because – thinking ahead – I made it very straightforward, what should be packed or not. At least so I thought. I’d have figured maybe an hour, 90 minutes to pack the bathroom? But clearly I underestimated that since lori ran about 3 hours, including vacuuming in a room with tile flooring. Later I figured out she was vacuuming dust off the window fan.

Meantime, M returns with food around 1pm, so we eat and I realize there is no way in hell we’re going to be done by 2. M calls the cleaners AND the landlords to push cleaning and walkthrough to later tomorrow. This gives us the rest of the day to pack/load, which we really did need. Aaron came over around 8pm, for an hour or so, to help and then take Lori (and donatables – yay, one less thing to worry about) home. We stayed till 10 or 11, then back again to the BevHo where we promptly collapsed.

Oh and shit! I can’t believe I forgot this! Around 2pm we realized that M had lost her wallet. We deduced she had it whilst going for lunch – wallet was attached to her keys – but then at some point after leaving the car upon arrival home (across the street, really, since the truck left no parking at home), the wallet vanished.

Needless to say, what was left of the house was upturned, the streets were searched, over and over because apart from any $ she had (about $500, mostly in traveler’s checks, so at least we were able to recoup that) and her license, medicare cards and keys, that wallet also held our only functioning credit card since – as you may recall – my bank accounts were still fucking frozen.

As you might imagine, the prospect of making this ginormous trip with no credit card was more than a little daunting. But wait! I remembered seeing the insta-credit card at El Casho Checko place, plus the fact that we could still get $ from her (unfrozen) account. Either the bank would let her get it directly (we hoped, using what limited info we had to prove her identity), or – again, thanks to my eagle eyes – she could write me a check, that I’d cash at El Casho Checko, and then we’d get the insta-card. Problem solved.

So off we went to our – thank god – prepaid hotel room (a deal which the falcon of priceline truth hath approved) and crashed. Well, not before going to walmart, because we accidentally packed my dresser before I had a chance to get half of my trip clothes out. Oops.

yes i'm still here

albeit very sporadically on Ye Olde Internet. i hope to have regular access soon, suffice to say it's been a whirlwind and i'll give you all the salacious details at a future date.

greetings from the land of the weary

i'll post a more comprehensive update in the future, of course, but suffice to say:

- we finally left san jose on tuesday, nov 6th
- which means yes, we're in oregon now (a nice la quinta inn in wilsonville)
- speaking of which, if you don't have a wireless card, this is a nice place to still score free computer access in the lobby, especially if you like listening to saturday night live at the same time
- i am tired
- thank goodness we have 3 bank accounts and credit cards between the two of us
- it is cold
- my dad was so excited to see us that on the way to the car (to meet us for lunch), he tripped and broke his hip (no, i'm not kidding)
- paying an extra $117 so you don't have to drive a 24ft truck + towed car into downtown portland -- totally worth it
- craigslist help up here appears even better than SJ. proof will be tomorrow, though, when we unload the behemoth
- did i mention it's cold?
- even with all the fiascos and stress of the last several weeks, and stress to come in procuring a new abode, i'm still so happy to be here

that's it for now. time to check on the laundry. =)

please hold

there has been quite the flurry of activity since my last post. packing, sure. final appointments, disconnecting services, etcetera, yes. but one thing you might not have suspected -- and certainly i did not expect -- is that my bank accounts would be inexplicably frozen and slated for closure.

maybe i'm crazy, but i think this is normal, not expecting your assets to freeze. at least if you aren't a felon, calling card scammer or involved in fraudulent financial transactions. and me? well i'm in the last category right now, at least according to my bank, WaMu, or as i think i'll call them from now on, ScrewYu.

it all started with the deposit of my final paychecks from work. what with the hordes of PTO i'd accrued (and yes, i accrued purposefully), i deposited a tidy sum at the atm. yes, i have since been told that i should go into the branch for large checks, even if it's, let's say, from my regular employer, who issues me large (though not that large) checks on a biweekly basis.

what with the amount of scrilla, i figured it would take several days for the checks to clear. fine. what i did not expect is that 4 business days later, i'd try to use my card at longs and it'd be denied. wtf? so i head to the bank and am informed that my account has been closed due to suspicious of fraud.

huh?

it took the very nice lady at the bank about a half hour to figure out the source of trouble (el checkos) and when she told me that they expected they checks to be returned unpaid, i just stared at her. i worked for a *very* big company. these are not checks from some fly-by-night startup. why wouldn't they be paid?

that was thursday morning. suffice to say, from then til 6pm friday i was working with both my former employer and ScrewYu to get things worked out so that we could, i don't know, MOVE THIS WEEKEND.

as you might guess, things did not work out. i have both ScrewYu and wells fargo to thank for that. we tried to make arrangements for some temporary scrilla to tide us over for an additional week, allowing us to make our trip as scheduled, but no luck.

which means, barring divine and fiduciary intervention, we're probably going to be here another week and a half. the *only* good thing i can say about this is that it gives us more time to pack. we'd decided to pay for some packing help, and well, now we can wrap that up ourselves. goody!

movin' some scrilla

by way of an update:

- had a fairly successful yard sale this weekend, close to $450. i hear that's not bad but the problem is, when we had our moving sale in montana, we cleared over a grand. so as is often the case with life, i'm learning to adjust my expectations.

- yard sale, alpha and omega version: sure, i was tired and sore after all that. but more to the point, min was completely wiped and ended up sleeping a lot of sunday. thankfully saturday was the big scrilla day. this also meant she missed a going-away dinner with a few friends (bummer) but of course, i still had a wonderful time.

- i've had trouble getting (free) moving boxes lately. six months ago? sure, no problem. but lately, every time i respond to a post, even if it's the same day, all zee boxes -- poof. since we had to get some additional moving supplies anyway tonight (why hello, shiny saran wrap-like tube!), and our departure date is a mere week away, we broke down and bought some boxes.

- in case you were wondering, i was LOATHE to buy moving boxes. they are expensive little bastards! however, we went here. sure, they had new boxes for a decent price. used boxes for even better. but then there was our section, which i guess you could call 'shagged a few times but still worth a go'. these boxes were che-e-ep. and still in very excellent condition. which made me very happy.

- speaking of happy, i don't miss work at all. zippo. like this is a surprise. i almost feel like i've been let out of prison.

- also, did i mention i'm tired? and more than a little overwhelmed at all that's left to do before we pack up the truck NEXT SUNDAY?

- i'm not sure when i'll post again, in the whirlwind of a week i have ahead of me, but if it's a while... think good thoughts for the dykes in the 24' truck, and i'll post again when i can. :)

- ps. thank god for hand trucks.

bite my shiny, imperial-fighting ass

since it's been over a WHOLE MONTH since my last quiz, a week since i posted anything, and i'm too bleary-eyed to be very coherent now:

Which sci-fi crew would you best fit in with?

You scored as Millennium Falcon (Star Wars) The world around you is at war. Fortunately you know how to handle that with the greatest of ease. You are one of the best at what you do and no one needs to tell you that. Now if only the droids could be quiet for five seconds. Serenity (Firefly) 88% Moya (Farscape) 88% Millennium Falcon (Star Wars) 88% Babylon 5 (Babylon 5) 81% SG-1 (Stargate) 81% Heart of Gold (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy) 75% Deep Space Nine (Star Trek) 75% Galactica (Battlestar: Galactica) 75% Andromeda Ascendant (Andromeda) 69% FBI's X-Files Division (The X-Files) 63% Enterprise D (Star Trek) 56% Nebuchadnezzar (The Matrix) 38% Bebop (Cowboy Bebop) 31%

p.s. tomorrow's my last day at work. i can't believe how giddy i am about it. i know, some of the giddy is just for the upcoming adventure in general but... i am seriously ready for a change.
p.p.s. futurama is not on the list of contendas! that's so wrong.

hello

i love you

a waking dream

i'm sure it will come as no surprise that i've been having trouble sleeping lately. excitement about moving also means stress about moving. if i wake up in the middle of the night to use the facilities, when i come back to bed i start thinking about all the stuff i need to do for our upcoming yard sale.

if i have trouble getting comfortable after i roll over, i remember i need to pick a hotel for our first week or so there.

and the list goes on. which means i do, too.

which means after a little while i remember a) you've got this all written down, stop worrying about it and b) it's time to invoke the Coast Snowfall.

now sure that's just a name for you folks. in my head i think, it's time to go *there*. Coast Snowfall's a fitting name though, because i immediately start playing the first snowfall (snippet here, courtesy B&N. nighttime version, courtesy of my internal ipod), and then go here.

imagine driving along this road, a series of trees in this light, and you can see how the dappled light could keep time with the beginning of that song (if you listen to it, hint). then we curve inland for a moment of dark and green, albeit not foggy in my nighttime film.

then we rise up the hill and crest to this, at which point i leave the car and become a bird, apparently, flying out and over the rocky shoreline. not a bad trick.

the song repeats itself at a certain point, and so do i, starting at the first image above. sure, sometimes it takes a while to progress from there to sleep, but i never get tired of this journey. or the song, which is saying a lot.

these flybys are a conglomeration of the many, many drives my family took along 101 in southern oregon, often at sunset. i've been using this little montage for probably 15 years.

incidentally, if you look at/listen to that song, you'll see it's an instrumental from a christmas album. what can i say? i've listened to that album a lot, which is KickAss. if you don't mind reverent *christmas* music and/or enjoy classical, i highly recommend it.

going to the salon is so old school

are you tired of having to explain what you *really* want to your hairdresser or barber? not to mention, shelling out for that haircut several times a year? well, thanks to this morning's internet, i offer you a possible solution:

THE FLOWBEE



as a bonus, apparently in your post-haircut bliss, you will get to see a vacuum hose and what looks like a giant flashlight fight to the death:



haircut clean up is only a suction away. please, act now, or else i will flowbee you a second time.

hello internet

i am tired. is it friday yet?

adventures in gmail advertising

while deleting in the spam folder:

Creamy Spam Broccoli Casserole - Makes 8 servings

enjoy!

sayonara (part 1)

yes this will be a continuing series but suffice to say, now i can say something i've been holding back for quite some time:

i'm quitting my job and moving to oregon.

to be precise, i'm not the only one moving to oregon. all living things (and oh, so many unliving things) in my household are moving as well. i haven't been able to talk about this before because there are a few people (hello!) from work who quietly read this blog. but now that i've given notice to the landlord and my workday overlord, now you're officially the last to know.

and yes this is partly why i've been posting less, mainly in terms of being verra busy on my weeknights and weekends doing prepwork. but honestly, the other reason is that work was just so damn crazy for quite some time.

as mentioned previously, i volunteered for bug czar duty on the previous push, in an entirely successful attempt to avoid javascript-happy specwork. the tradeoff, of course, is people pinging you night AND day. there's a certain thrill in people constantly clamoring for your attention, even if it's only for input on inane issues. however it does get a little tiring, being in the spotlight so long. and let's just say that the work for the current push -- while not involving much specwork, thank you -- has still been driving me crazy, although that's more about people and process rather than the actual work.

if you're wondering, no i do not have a job up there yet. there have been attempts, of course, and even a job offer earlier this year (yes, this has been in progress for quite some time). however the job meant living in corvallis and while that area has a few charms, for the most part it's the opposite of bewitching.

which is why we're moving to the general portland vicinity, preferably somewhere south/west/central. want to be close to my parents, but also, i want to be in a larger city. i want to feel that energy buzzing all around me, but at a leisurely, oregonized pace. our little family needs good access to all things medical, as well, and so again, portland beats out corvallis (or most anywhere in the state) by a landslide.

then there's all the great memories i have in portland. having chocolates and steamed milk with my mom at pioneer square, trolling through vast, verdant washington park, meandering through powell's for hours, walking in the light drizzle just about anywhere, with everything green fragrantly blossoming all around me.

those are just some of the reasons i can't wait to go.

as to when we go -- we'll be up there by the end of october. which means now i need to pack and finish getting ready.

um. holy shit.

for me loyal scallywags

happy talk like a pirate day!

and to those of you with kids, i offer this unexpected treasure from my inbox this morning. i mean, really...a chance to indoctrinate your younglings from the getgo? pretty hard to resist, i'd think.

plus, if you've ever wanted a badass name for your vehicle, the generator will set you up. for the record, i now drive "The Barbaric Cream Puff".

for a good time, call 1-800-BEAMEUP

from an email list's event announcement:

If you show up, you will be abducted.

This is the kind of ROI I can get behind.

could not resist

even though one answer was wrong (two answers were correct). see if you can guess which one!

You Scored an A

It's pretty obvious that you don't make basic grammatical errors. If anything, you're annoyed when people make simple mistakes on their blogs. As far as people with bad grammar go, you know they're only human. And it's humanity and its current condition that truly disturb you sometimes.

The It's Its There Their They're Quiz

48.0 LTS Keggar!!

that was the title of the skype chat we had going all night during last week's live code push at work, and yes i came up with the title, and yes i purposely mispelled kegger. consider it a token of my attempt to have a good time, even though i was pulling a 930pm-645am shift. for the record, on a normal day i probably roll in around 10am.

pre-push, i had grand visions of using this time to write several witty posts, which you may notice did not occur. while i did get some very minor reading done, fact was i was too busy talking to people all night, looking into prospective web dev issues. gratefully there were no actual issues for our team, but that didn't stop the powers that be from thinking we might be at fault. thus, the busyness. the morning came rather quickly, and then i got the rest of the day off. pretty nice.

in other news, i saw my sister and her cohorts yesterday. if you're keeping track, now the clan is up to 4. for quite some time there's been drake and mike. now there's also danni, who is actually mike's wife. long story? why yes it is!

suffice to say that the foursome has been in the making for quite some time, and a month or so into things, they seem to be happy campers. especially my sister, grateful to have another girl around. who can blame her? girls rule.

anyway we drove out to stockton -- a midpoint for both of us -- and met them at a marie callendar's 'because their salad bar kicks ass!' (said my sister, when i asked where she wanted to eat). she did put together a tasty salad, i'll give her that. i forgot how good their cornbread is, but to be honest i wasn't impressed with much else. however, we had a delightful visit, weren't pestered to leave even though we were there chatting for hours, and really, that's all i wanted.

that's it for updates. hey, that's more than you've gotten in weeks! have a little gratitude. sheesh. ;)